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Clarke and Dawe on Abbott's adventures -

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Clarke and Dawe on Abbott's adventures

Broadcast: 04/03/2010

Reporter: John Clarke and Brian Dawe

John Clarke and Bryan Dawe with an adventurous Tony Abbott.

Transcript

KERRY O'BRIEN, PRESENTER: Time for John Clarke, Bryan Dawe, and Tony Abbott's Excellent Outback
Adventure.

BRYAN DAWE: Tony Abbott, Tony Abbott, are you there?

I can't see him anywhere. Where is he?

JOHN CLARKE: Bryan, I'll be with you in a minute. Hang on a minute, I'm nearly there. Hang on.

BRYAN DAWE: Mr Abbott...

JOHN CLARKE: Sorry, turn off the satellite phone. Oh, good on you, thank you. What about the clingy
look? Do you like the clingy look?

Good on you. Just put the satellite phone off because I'm going to be talking to Bryan. Thank you
very much.

BRYAN DAWE: Mr Abbott...

JOHN CLARKE: No, that's the stove, but turn that off too. And the fridge. Put them in the truck.

BRYAN DAWE: Mr Abbott? Mr Abbott, where are you?

JOHN CLARKE: Trucks the one with the wheels. Sorry, with you, Bryan. I'll go a beer when I get out
of this, I'll tell you that for nothing.

BRYAN DAWE: Mr Abbott, where are you?

JOHN CLARKE: Uh... out in the outback, Bryan, we're out in the outback.

BRYAN DAWE: Who is there with you?

JOHN CLARKE: Nobody is here with me, Bryan, this is just man against the elements out here.

I beg your pardon? Have you got a press pass? If you've got accreditation go to the tent.

BRYAN DAWE: What's going on?

JOHN CLARKE: I'll think you'll be in number B stand but go and check in first, you know. You'll be
right.

BRYAN DAWE: Mr Abbott, it looks very remote out there.

JOHN CLARKE: It's terribly, terribly remote. I haven't seen anybody for the...

Beg your pardon? No, I'll have the fillet steak well done and a lemon tart thank you very much -
and a shiraz.

Sorry, Bryan.

BRYAN DAWE: You were a bit lucky, aren't you? I mean, we nearly lost you the other night.

JOHN CLARKE: Ah, it's just a flesh wound, Bryan.

BRYAN DAWE: But it must have been worrying - very worrying.

JOHN CLARKE: Well, you know, cometh the hour, Bryan and, uh...

BRYAN DAWE: Cometh the tax message.

JOHN CLARKE: The point I'm trying to make here, Bryan, is that fortunately, I'm - I was perfectly
OK. It was a, you know, nasty, rather anxious moment but fortunately everything is okay.

BRYAN DAWE: But you did a send a text message, didn't you?

JOHN CLARKE: Tried to send a text message. We couldn't work out how to do it.

BRYAN DAWE: Yeah, did you have any food?

JOHN CLARKE: Ah, no worry about food out here, Bryan. Plenty of tucker if you know what you are
doing. You know, there are goannas and snakes and birds and witchetty grubs and...

BRYAN DAWE: Yeah, and what did you have?

JOHN CLARKE: I had the fillet snake and the lemon tart. I can't get enough of it, Bryan, but
they'll bend over themselves backwards if you want something that's not on the menu, they are very
good out here.

BRYAN DAWE: Mr Abbott, did you have any idea where you were?

JOHN CLARKE: No idea at all, Bryan. We were completely lost.

BRYAN DAWE: Sp what did the text message say exactly?

JOHN CLARKE: Well, it just said that we were lost.

BRYAN DAWE: Whereabouts?

JOHN CLARKE: Fossil Creek. Lost near fossil Creek, it said.

BRYAN DAWE: Lost near Fossil Creek.

JOHN CLARKE: Yeah.

BRYAN DAWE: Well, how did you know you were near Fossil Creek?

JOHN CLARKE: I could... see fossils, Bryan.

BRYAN DAWE: And obviously a creek.

JOHN CLARKE: And a creek. Yeah, bush skills, basically - basic bush skills, Bryan. I mean either
you've got them or haven't and fortunately I have.

BRYAN DAWE: Who did you send the message to, Mr Abbott?

JOHN CLARKE: I could only remember one number, Bryan.

BRYAN DAWE: Oh, your wife, obviously.

JOHN CLARKE: No, I didn't want to worry me wife, no. No, we needed help, Bryan. The position was
pretty desperate.

BRYAN DAWE: Triple-0.

JOHN CLARKE: Nope, couldn't remember triple-0, Bryan.

BRYAN DAWE: Well, who did you call?

JOHN CLARKE: Contacted me Press Secretary. First things first, Bryan.

BRYAN DAWE: Mr Abbott, are you aware that Kevin Rudd has announced a $30 billion plan to fix the
public health system?

JOHN CLARKE: Has he?

BRYAN DAWE: Yes.

JOHN CLARKE: Yeah, well that's not publicity, Bryan, this is publicity.

BRYAN DAWE: Mr Abbott, thanks for your time.

JOHN CLARKE: Hang on a minute! Stay still, everybody! Some sort of a buffalo. Hang on, I've got
him!